Here I am - this is me
There's no where else on earth I'd rather be
It's a new world - it's a new start
It's alive with the beating of young hearts
It's a new day - it's a new plan
I've been waiting for you
Here I am !!
INCREDIBLE!! I know this phase of life cannot go undocumented in life. This is a moment I have been wanting to live this for atleast a year now. Prayers and Blessings have all been centred around this. Thankfully, my belief in all of them has been reinstated like never before. Thank God. Thank you all, good souls.
But as much as I want to write, I sense that this is some kind of that feeling that cannot be classified. That cannot be written about. It's happy, it's melancholic, it's confusing. It's all on me now. I had anticipated it before, I was sort of prepared to face it too. This whole big new world of me and me only. Yes, ofcourse, I cannot imagine how horrible it would have been if not for the people around me now - My only hope. But then, I am on my own. I am the only stakeholder of myself, of all that i do, of all that I am, atleast as far as i can see. Maybe thousands of miles across the seas there are souls thinking of my food, my schedule. It's really kinda touching and weird. But all we can do is think of each other and indeed, that IS it, sadly. As I often say and fear, we will get used to living without each other. We'd soon be a non-entity in each other's lives, dispensable, won't we?. Well, stands like too much of a sacrifice? Let's see.
So here I am, at CMU, living my dream. It is indeed an undefinable feeling, to be in this time, this place, with these people around, as me. A gasp of the cool air around me is all i can do to explain how it feels, English is short of words!
Ofcourse, the share of problems remain, they just increase the worthiness of the happy moments. I landed in America with a bang, with four cancelled/rescheduled flights, funny incidencts, a 500$ per night accomomdation in NY on the first day of my stay here :D, lol. Then this beautiful Pittsburgh became a part of my life. Ofcourse, it was horrible to furnish the house, make a home out of it, to get used to the fact that there would be no steaming dinner anymore when I enter home with my hunger pangs at their peak, the fact that yelling at people would do no good to the food or would no more get me some pampering. But yea, it's but a small trade-off to living a dream.
So this is my new phase of life, blindfolded and ready to go through whatever comes my way.Very special and very demanding at the same time. But it is,trust me, indeed, great!
So here's wishing all you people out there, all of you kind enough to read this, that you get to live through a dream like this - when every problem that occurs on the way seems small, that you grow as a person, to look at things from a larger perspective, that you rise above small problems that just make everyday more worthwhile, in retrospect.
Godspeed.
